my thoughts, exactly.

I am thankful.

Thanksgiving is 3 days away.

For the past couple of weeks, I’ve seen many status updates on Facebook from people, friends, stating things that they’re thankful for. Some of them were great, truly thankful posts. Some of the others, though - the ones about being thankful for a designer shoe collection or a new Coach bag, gave me pause. But, I continued on with my business, moving right along to the next comment or responding to the next event invite that was waiting. After all, I have many other things to do.

Last night, I read an article about a woman who crashed her car on the 118 freeway, just minutes after Bobby and I had exited two streets in front of her. She lost her life and left her 2-year old little boy behind, trapped in the car, securely fastened in his car seat. Luckily, he will survive and be cared for by family, but he will now spend the rest of his life without his mother. I do not have children, and I can’t possibly understand what it must be like to be without my mother, but to me, this is a very, very sad situation and my heart breaks for this little boy and his family.

My life has recently been put into crystal clear perspective, and I would like to take a moment to really be thankful for what matters in my life.

My hope is that you will do the same with yours.

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I am not perfect. In fact, I have many flaws. These flaws are what make me unique and, for that, I am thankful.

I am asthmatic, but I have healthcare and can afford the medicine that helps me breathe and, for that, I am thankful.

I am happy to take the parking spot in the back of the lot, because it means that I can walk and, for that, I am thankful.

I do not have a big house or drive a brand new car, but I have a roof over my head that keeps me safe every night, and a car that gets me to where I need to be and, for that, I am thankful.

I do not have a lot of money, but I am debt free and, for that, I am thankful.

I am not skinny, but I am healthy and, for that, I am thankful. 

I do not eat a cooked meal every night; some nights I may only eat cereal, but I do not go to bed hungry and, for that, I am thankful. 

I do not have the most well-behaved dogs, but they love me unconditionally and they are healthy and happy and, for that, I am thankful.

I can’t carry a tune to save my life, but I have a voice and, for that, I am thankful.

I do not have perfect vision, but I have glasses to help me see and, for that, I am thankful.

I am thankful for my mom and my dad.

I am thankful for a man who really does love me.

I am thankful for my siblings. And all of their rivalry.

I am thankful for the warm blankets I can pull over me when I’m cold and for the air conditioning I can turn on when I’m too warm.

I am thankful for clean water to drink.

I am thankful that I can vote.

I am thankful for my best friend.

I am thankful that I don’t have to sleep on the streets.

I am thankful to be alive.  

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Slow down. Make time. Hug the people you love. Kiss them. Tell them you love them. Don’t waste time on nonsense. Have no regrets.

You never know when it’ll be too late.

me vs. food network

so, yesterday morning AFTER we had returned from the market, bob said he wanted me to make him the egg tart thingy that is on the cover of the current food network magazine.

being that it was now pouring rain outside and i wasn’t about to go back to the market, i took to the pantry and fridge to see what ingredients i had on hand. no puff pastry, i used crescent dough. no havarti cheese, i used a parmesan/asiago/romano blend. instead of a sunny side up egg, i did an over-medium egg (bob’s choice).

bob was happy.

day #5 - in closing.

well, i did it. I FREAKING DID IT! i drank every single juice, all 30 of them, without quitting. 5-days. no food. no chewing. no utensils. no plates. no bowls. no alcohol. no caffeine. just lots and lots of drinking. and, well, i’m a really good drinker now.

how was it? it was tough. like, really god damn tough.

would i do it again? i don’t know. maybe. 

do i recommend it? sure. if you have willpower.

it wasn’t even so much the absence of food, because i really wasn’t hungry, but the lack of chewing and not using utensils for an entire week was bizarre. imagine not holding a fork or a spoon or a knife for 5 days. you don’t really think about it until you’re not doing it. and even though i wasn’t hungry, the thought of food invaded my mind constantly. especially the tuna sandwich, which now that i’m done cleansing, i don’t even want anymore. of course.

the remainder of day #5 was relatively uneventful. well, with the exception of my trip to whole foods, which was incredibly eventful. and expensive. how can vegetables and brown rice cost so much money?!?

anyhow, it’s the morning of the first day post-cleanse and i feel great! the energy that i’ve been waiting for all week has finally arrived. i ordered some supplemental juices to have for the weekend, so i had one this morning and plan to eat fairly raw for the remainder of the day. i can add some grains later this afternoon and by dinner i can have cottage cheese. tomorrow i’ll be able to have some soup, steamed vegetables, and fish. i’m so excited!

so, in closing, i guess i just have to say that i really like food. and i really like eating. i will never not eat bread, or cheese, or bacon, or drink wine, or coffee, or any of the other things i enjoy so much. for me, that would be a boring existence. however, i will continue to drink green juices and am even considering buying my own juicer.

well, it’s been a long week. thanks for reading.

time for some retail therapy. and perhaps a cup of decaf.

xx
h.

day #4

the day didn’t get much better for me yesterday until after i got home. i was grumpy all day and was having trouble focusing at work. thank god the dizziness started to subside before i had to drive. i had a massage at 6:30p, and i have to say that it was incredibly therapeutic. after the massage, i drank my almond milk thingy and immediately fell asleep on the couch. i can’t believe it, but i only got up 4 times last night to pee! yep, i was THAT tired.

it’s now DAY #5, my last day of cleansing! i felt great this morning after i got up and got moving. i was excited at the thought of only 3 juices today instead of 6, so imagine my disappointment when i arrived at work to find ALL 6 juices in my fridge for today. OY VEY. so much for raw veggies and fruits today. {sigh}. it’s fine. i feel good today and will drink the shit out of these last 6 juices! also, i lost another pound overnight, and even though it’s only water weight, i feel pretty good about that. so here we go again, but i’m in the home stretch… 1 juice down today, 5 to go. i’ll talk to everyone later.

day #3 was not the best.

after getting off to a pretty good start yesterday morning, things quickly went down hill in the afternoon. by 2p i was extremely dizzy and just not feeling right. it subsided a bit after a while, but by the time i got home around 6p, the dizziness was back. i was also freezing cold, my stomach was upset, and i was so tired i could barely keep my eyes open. i skipped the yoga and the jaunt around the block in favor of the couch and several blankets. i drank quite a bit of tea last night in hopes of it helping with the nausea, but all it did was keep me up all night peeing twice as much as the rest of this week. i’m not sure what happened, as i stuck to my juice schedule all day and drank plenty of water. perhaps it’s the toxins leaving my body? i don’t know. whatever it was, it sucked.

it’s now about 11a the morning of day #4, and i’m absolutely exhausted. i feel like i could sleep for a week. i have to say that i’m pretty much over this whole juice drinking thing. i’m totally bored with it and i’m not really feeling any better today (still dizzy and i’m so cold, it’s unbelievable), which is making me grumpy. i’m not sure what positive things i’m getting out of this cleanse at this point. although, i did weigh myself this morning and i’ve lost 6lbs. i don’t know from where, everything still seems the same to me, but apparently i have. so there is that. i’m on juice #2 now, which as you all know, is my favorite, so i’m ok for now, but i don’t know if i’ll make it through the day. all i can think about right now is a tuna fish sandwich on wheat toast with avocado and tons of dijon mustard. the thing is though, i’m actually not even hungry, and i would probably be so sick if i tried to eat that. so, i’m a bit of an unhappy camper today, but maybe the day will turn around for me. here’s hoping.

day #2 & the dawn of day #3

after i got to work and got going yesterday, things were a lot better. i got through the day and was able to drink all of my liquids without dropping them or feeling like i was going to drown. it actually got easier! i did feel a bit hungry yesterday around 6p (when bob phoned to tell me he wanted ramen for dinner), but it only lasted for a few minutes and i didn’t feel hungry again after that; not even when bob was eating ramen in front of me. jerk. my massage was amazing, and i think also very necessary. i got a combination deep tissue/pressure points massage with stretching which was perfect, and had i not been up all night peeing again (seriously, this has got to stop), i likely would have slept like a rock. so far, i’ve not really noticed any weight loss, but i do feel less bloated, my cheeks are really pink, and still no headache!

beginning of day #3 and i feel good! i think i’ve turned the corner, solid food is no longer necessary. the absence of chewing isn’t even bothering me anymore and i can chug water like nobody’s business. i’ll be ready for my 2nd juice in about 30-minutes and i’m really looking forward to it. with the exception of the #6 almond milk juice (unicorn’s nectar), this #2 juice is my favorite. it’s highly likely that once i’m finished with this cleanse, i will continue to drink the almond milk juice and the roots 2 juice. tonight i’m going to do some light yoga and perhaps go for a jaunt around the neighborhood with the boys. i want to run, but the woman i spoke with at pressed advised against it. perhaps, it’s to avoid passing out from lack of solid foods. i don’t know. but being that my equilibrium is a bit off (forgot to mention that, sorry. just a little bit of wall bumpage here and there), probably best to take it a little easy.

for now i must go, but i’ll be back tomorrow. don’t you worry.

day #1 is in the books.

thank god. i didn’t think i was going to make it yesterday. i almost quit at least six times. there is so much juice, and water, and tea, and OMG it’s just SO much drinking. do you realize how challenging it is to drink 16oz of juice every two hours IN ADDITION TO 8-10 glasses of water, a 16oz chlorophyll water, a 16oz almond milk thingy, a 16oz aloe vera water, and a tea in like 12-hours? I DO! it’s not normal, and i could barely keep up with the schedule. my stomach was sloshing when i walked. EW. by the time i got home from work, i was so tired of just drinking, i cut up some cucumber slices thinking i would devour them - nope. it did feel nice to actually chew something (that’s why we have teeth… for EATING), but i wasn’t even hungry. bob ended up sharing them with the dog. so, by 9:30p, i had gotten through all of the juices, the chlorophyll water, 8.5 glasses of regular water, the almond milk thingy (i’m already looking forward to it tonight), the tea, and about half of the aloe vera water - then i passed out. literally, like face down on the couch. OUT. goodnight, we’ll see everyone later. oh, but i didn’t stay asleep for long. nope. i was up EIGHT TIMES in the night to pee. 8 times. not much sleeping. way too much peeing. i was pretty tired this morning and it took me a while to get ready to leave the house. i also dumped an entire coconut water in my purse and all over my feet as i was about to walk out the door. bob thought it was funny and asked me if i wanted a bite of his cereal. jerk. totally NOT helping, even after i made him dinner last night. JERK. it’s fine. i’ll wait patiently until he starts his cleanse. muahhhhhahahaha.

anyhow, it’s 10a on day #2 and i’m doing ok. i’ve had 2 glasses of water, a coconut water, juice #1, and now a lemon tea. i’m not hungry at all and still no headache. maybe the headache isn’t going to come? perhaps i should stop waiting for it. i have a massage tonight which i’m really looking forward to. afterwards, i’m already planning a bath and then will settle in with my almond milk thingy and my tea. exciting life i’m leading right now, eh?